Monday, June 13, 2016

The Value of Life

It is sad when we must be shown reminders of life's value. The tragic event in Orlando has left 50 dead and 53 wounded. Hate, selfishness, and greed have once again left their calling card on the lives of people not just in Orlando but the world.

Some of us don't realize yet just how costly such things are. They don't understand just how wrong they are. So I shall try to relay the importance.

Like Orlando I was shaken when a dear friend recently. In the midst of discussion he told me he did not think all people mattered. He had resigned himself to believe only some were capable of being saved and mattered in the long run.

So where to begin? Life, matters. All life matters. We are quite simply a part of a whole so grand our minds could explore indefintely and never reach an end. Life is the fabric of reality. It shapes every bolt, colors every skein, and weaves its self into brilliant creations nothing else can.

Take one of the primitive and isolated tribes still here on the Earth. They are much the same as they always have been. They choose to live in peace and reject what is not theirs. They choose to remain pure.

Pure....what a word. We have only to look at other primitive societies to see what happens when they finally succumb to people more advanced than them. They lose their way, they are exploited, and they are hurt. There is nothing pure about that.

Now some would argue they choose to make contact, interact, and to interfere stopping  it in its self exposes them to harm. And on each of those counts they would be wrong.  People, life, deserves a chance to be free, they deserve to be left alone, and their life is most certainly their own.

You see in the rush to achieve whatever goal you have, lofty or hideous, we have forgotten it's not your choice it is each and every one of ours. Just as the many can not dictate to the few, the few can not dictate to the whole. 

So what am I trying to say? The value of life is measured in every thread of that grand fabric. As I have mentioned before removing any piece, against it's will, will undo it all. And if you have ever tried to use a blanket full of holes in winter you quickly learn the value of those threads you pulled out.

You may not like a color, a texture, or even a pattern but you must realize you only have rights to your own thread. One thread can not dictate to an another how to be and one pattern can not remove another simply because it interferes in its grand design.

Like the primitive peoples we are all seeking to be pure. Pure in that which is us. No one has the right to take that from another. Exploitation, coercion, and harm are no ones right. And if you stand idlly by allowing it to occur, knowing full well the thread or threads have no clue what is about to rip them asunder then you are just as guilty and the ones who do.

Why do I say this? The blessings of life are fostered by us all. If we can not stand up to those who would cut a bolt into pieces for selfish needs then you by default have forfeit your own thread. If you can not stand with another thread how can you argue for the sanctity of your own?

Like in Orlando someone just cut a large swath from the fabric of Humanity. They did so selfishly and greedily. The reason does not matter as much as the act. We each have our lives, our choices, and our free will. Like it or not many threads were just forcibly removed from the fabric of life.

Do you leave the holes till winter or do you stand and let the cutter and all like him know in one voice you have no right. You have no right to take what is mine. You have no right to undo what we have created. You have no right to harm.

Some would say how do we achieve justice for such an act. You achieve justice by being vigilant. Stop those you know mean harm. I don't call for violence. That is how we got here. When threads have issues be it their own or those pressed upon them the answer is what those primitive peoples seek, purety.

If any thread of Humanity can not function in the fabric of others maybe they need to be separated so they can weave their own cloth for a while. They will quickly find although it is pleasing to be so free in design that they are only one thread, one texture, one color. When that variety is gone their world gets substantially smaller and dimmer.

I've had my own thread hacked, cut, stained, and harmed in so many ways. But in this I say in all clarity it is mine and mine alone. No one else can barter me or decide for me. And as much as the fabric has hurt me I am a part of it.

Mend the holes we know bear and stop any future ones for no one has the right to rip asunder a bolt without full, knowing, and unclouded consent of each and every thread in its design. Let your rainbow fly for every thread of it is us.

Love is Never Wrong!

Sunday, June 5, 2016


Today I want to talk about a very serious topic. Many of us in life are survivors. Some of us however have harder stories than others. Regardless we each have our pains. Each and everyone of us feel it differently or has maybe had to much for one soul to bear.

I can't tell you such pains, indignity, or horrors will leave your mind. Sometimes you just can't forget things. Sometimes to do so might do more harm than if they remained. I can tell you however life is one day at a time. I can tell you there are good people out there somewhere. I can tell you there may very well be good times to come.

Life is not always easy. Sometimes it's a nightmare. Sometime we are left so shaken we have nothing left to rebuild with. These are the times when I tell you to cling to the light and the good people. Sometimes you have to borrow strength, will, and hope from others because yours is shattered laying strewn and broken across the ground.

The hardest thing I can tell you is when you have reached those points. Maybe it has been to horrific or you have endured to much for to long. We as a people have a responsibility to help those try and rebuild. We may not succeed and we may not know how but we must try.

I've shared with you all some of the things I have been through. There have been many more. I've walked in Hell. Some owe me debts they can never repay. Some would laugh in my face at the thought they owed me a thing. In all honesty I have my days where I wonder if I can hold these pains and tears.

Being a survivor is not easy. There is one thing I can tell you all with certainty however. Your still here. That my dear friends gives you a chance and hope. I know that feeling of being so broken you have nothing left and wobble like a house of cards shaking in the wind. I know the shame and pain. I know the indignity of people who commit such atrocities walking free and unpunished. I know the hurt of running into them and all that rises back up.

Cling to the light. Whether it be faith, a friend, family, or whatever lends you enough power for one more day. Why some of you may ask? Well, my answer is quite simple. With enough days you may begin to rebuild some of those shattered pieces even if ever so slowly.

I can only tell you all to try. Take that unsteady step forward. It is fine to to shuffle your feet and inch forward every so cautiously. It is ok to have doubts. It is ok to cry. It is ok to ache. Be you however you can. Life is about living.

We can't control the actions of others but we can live. Maybe we have to move or relearn how but we have to live. Now I won't pretend that are not things so vile or you have gone through to much and you cant make it. However you must try.

In my own life there are things that have gone on so long, things so painful,  and event so horrific I don't have a clue how to fix them all. I'm not even sure they can ever be completely fixed. Still I try. I hope, I pray, and I take those uneasy steps that one day I may find peace, love, and joy of once again being just me.

Being a survivor I can tell you is probably the hardest, most painful, and emotionally tiring thing I can imagine. I can also tell you it is the most vital thing we can do. Our words, our stories, and our lives can share and pass on these things to others. We can make them aware. We one by one can make a difference in the lives of others who have endured. We can warn and protect others from enduring.

Survival is about life. It is about our own and all those around us. We are the light offering shelter to others lost in darkness. And we we are warnings to stay out of it. If nothing else we love. I know that one can be oh so hard but trust me true love doesn't hurt.

Love others, love life and love you. That journey through the night will bring you unto morning. Rest safely then and know another day has past. A new piece of you has been built. Who knows with enough days you will learn even at night we can turn on the lights.

Survival is about love. It's about loving you. Even if we must borrow the love of others to begin doing that.

Love is Never Wrong!

Friday, June 3, 2016

Just Pee

I had a lovely smile today when I found this on the Joe My God news blog.  Leave it to Broadway to say it so well and with such humor. I hope you all enjoy it.

Love is never Wrong!

Saturday, May 14, 2016

Transgender Depression

Being transgender has a lot of things that go with it but some of the largest ones are dysphoria and depression.  Today I am letting others speak and share their stories.

Dysphoria and depression are never easy but there are things we can do to help. However if you can not handle things on your own please find someone to help.

Love is never Wrong!

Thursday, May 12, 2016

Restroom Privledge

So all over the news lately is the battle over can LGBT people use the restroom they identify with. Specifically it targets those who are transgender. The need to use a restroom is a fundamental thing all people must do. To eliminate them from public facilities is quite unfair.

So let's look at the argument against. The main thing I am hearing is the fear women and children will be hurt by people dressing up as women. Can this happen? Yes it can. The problem is I see no one fighting to limit other problems. In recent news a man forced a 9 year old into a restroom and began kissing her. A priest took pictures of children and women using a restroom.... And these happened in non integrated places.

There are dangerous people in the world. I can understand caution but I can also realize you can not hold all people accountable for the action of one or a few. As of me writing this there have not been any instances of transgender people abusing another person in a bathroom of their identity.

So we are back to is limiting transgender people the right response? No, it is not. If you are so concerned about assaults, rapes, or abductions why not stiffen penalties for those who commit them? Preventing those who do no harm form using a restroom, a basic Human need, is not right.

If we look at pictures transgender people have published you can see a woman walking into a men's restroom or vice versa to coincide with their birth identity is just foolish. You make everyone feel threatened and place people in danger of being hurt.

So now we have a situation where you claim to be protecting people but are hurting others by decree. That's not a good law or policy. That is merely fear and misunderstanding. I understand some of us out there don't know what to do and they fear what might occur. However we must learn to accept difference and extend trust. If we can not do that then fear will always be our guide and that only causes pain.

What I do see developing is reactionary movements instead of discussion and understanding. A man just in the last day dressed up in a wig and skirt and paraded in and out of a women's restroom to prove a point and he bragged about it. He claimed he was warning people of danger.

What did he accomplish? He made customers fearful for their safety, not from being preyed upon but  from a man in a costume who did not identify as female using a restroom. He did so and bragged about it nationally. Now with attention I'm sure one of two things will happen.

The real people with mental disorders will try to copy the act and some may get hurt. The other possibility is a zealot with a martyr mentality will attempt to prove a point to have validation for their cause. Both of these happen when issues of this sensitivity occur. Congratulations or creating a new problem.

Hurting some to protect others is not right or a good balance. Giving ideas to those who truly can cause harm is even worse.  Acting in fear and stirring more fear up is never right. So what are our options?

I think first we need to agree all people should be able to use the restroom. If you are transgender you should use the bathroom you identify with. Should their be tougher laws to protect those who use restrooms? Yes. By all means create new laws to protect children, women, elderly and whoever is hurt in a restroom. These are places where we are all vulnerable in.

However laws should punish the crime and protect those who can not protect themselves. They should never block those who have never done anything wrong.  And I think that is the point. Guilty until proven innocent and guilty by definition are not good laws or policies.

Think about your actions. Learn what you do not know. Hear what all sides have to say. And reach out in love and understanding to all involved. In all things be firm and fair. Allow justice to reign when there has been a crime. Be vigilant to those who truly cause harm. Trust people and give them a chance.

So whats my simple solution? Maybe the people you are trying to protect others from are those who have proven to hurt others, not those who have not. Be honest, humble, and willing to listen and learn. We are all Human. Treat all people as Humans.

Love is Never Wrong!

Friday, May 6, 2016

Meet My Child

I found this video on the Towleroad news blog today and found it to be a very good piece. So I'd like to share it with you all.

Love is Never Wrong!

Tuesday, May 3, 2016


Being LGBT we face so many things that cause us pain in life. Trying to figure yourself out in a world that has little to no definition of you is hard. Add in misunderstanding and hate it gets worse. Top that with those who for whatever reason dismiss your pain and life can be down right miserable.

I have known a lot of pain in my time. More pain has visited my soul than any person should have to bear. To me the most hurtful pains are those misguided people who try to force you to be something you are not and can never be and of course those who dismiss your pain.

If you are out there and don't understand then let me try and give you a glimpse of my perspective.

It hurts to be peacefully sitting in a doctors office waiting your turn and you have to hear someone make a gay joke. It hurts when people stare at you because your not quite masculine enough and they are judging you. It hurts when career options are eliminated because your not what they want.

It hurts knowing you have to censor yourself just to be safe, to be safe from being murdered and hung from a fence in the middle of no where. It hurts when your doctor is not LGBT friendly and you can not share all the details that may pertain to you. It hurts knowing at any time you can be evicted from your apartment, fired from your job, or denied service for simply existing.

It hurts when people you love say things that undermine your very existence. It hurts that simple expressions of love are as dangerous as committing a robbery. It hurts when people who are leaders want to arrest, imprison, and murder you. It hurts when men of God forsake love for hate. It hurts...

For all of you out there who still don't get it I only want love. I don't care if you don't understand, I don't care if you don't agree, and I don't care if you find it odd. I do care how you treat me.

All people in this world deserve equal treatment, respect, and love. All people hurt but people should not hurt for simply existing. I am me! I am love! I hurt!

Part of me wants to say shame! The other says there has been enough pain. Let's just love each other as fellow souls on this earth. If you don't want to be part of my life then don't be. But, it is my life and I am entitled to live it as I am and as I choose.

There is enough pain in life as it is. Stop the hurt! Love!

Love is Never Wrong!