Here in the U.S. we are having our midterm elections. How we move forward as a nation maters this time around. I won't tell you who to vote for. Blue or red are just colors. What I will say is vote for Love. Love for everyone.
From many we make one. Let us consider that when we cast our ballot. We are the keeper of our brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers... If your vote does not help all in some positive way then choose another. It is not about agreement or approval. It is about acceptance and love.
In the end is is about the red, white, and blue. Remember that. We are one. Take care of one another and always honor and respect. If you can't give it you will never receive it. Vote for love.
Love is Never Wrong!
Tuesday, November 6, 2018
Sunday, November 4, 2018
Mental Illness
Today we need to talk. We need to talk about things that are so prevalent in our lives. The stigma and pain of mental illness. Being LGBT we suffer so much from depression and many other issues due to society and our families. It is a pain we struggle with and not enough of us talk about it. We suffer so much already.
I'm going to share some things from my life and those I know. The first thing I can say is there is always someone in or near you, dealing with issues, that may need help greater than they can deal with on their own. It is alright to get help. Talking about such things is also ok. There is no shame in someone needing help. There is only shame in those who refuse help or ridicule those in trouble.
Throughout my blog I have talked about my sexual abuse by a family member beginning when I was ten. This person assumed we were in a relationship. We were not. I had no concept of sex at that time. I truly was an oblivious child lost in worlds of wonder my mind provided.
Even to this day that family member walks free and never truly accepts the impact that he had on my life. His mind sees it as a consensual relationship. My mind views it as a horrible awakening into a world of nightmares. There are things I may never forget or truly let go of but I take each day one step at a time.
I talk to whoever I think can handle such, who feels safe. Sometimes I think some of them need to be awarded medals for hearing my stories. They are not easy or kind things to the hear. They can elicit such rage. But I try to remain calm. For me my faith was my comfort.
The sad thing is we have a few in my family with issues. One is the mother of my abuser. When my cousins husband found out about the abuse he was a good man. He wanted to get me help and call the police. I wish he had. Maybe things could have been resolved better.
But that didn't happen. The mother of my abuser intervened. She is a very xenophobic person and rules with an iron fist. I still recall her words to him as if some stoic iron willed titan glared into his soul. "You married into this family . You are not a part of it. This will be dealt with by us." Sadly it was not.
So my family member was now supported by someone who's xenophobia is so extreme she believes in arranged unions and selective partnerships. In other words if you do not pass her muster you are not worthy of the family. Like I said I have a few in my family.
If she were to read this now she would lecture me and badger me into removing these accounts. To her only her world matters. Even when she does help others it becomes a story to promote herself. I believe there are good intentions there but therein lies a problem.
She in her own minds traumas desperately tries to mold the world around her. If everything is not in place or proper order or if things are not controlled she begins to falter. It is never good to let issues go for to long and not face them. She is proof of such. Her world is a glass menagerie. You can look and admire but do not touch. If one of the animals falls and shatters, so does she.
I have a friend who is a good man. but being burdened with a failing marriage and working in health care one night a baby died while he was trying to save it. He has never been the same after that. Sometimes we just snap when our minds can handle no more.
Thankfully he got help. Therapy and medicines now give him a much more normal life. He is not healed but I think he is slowly getting better. It forced him to understand his limits and explore more about who he truly is. And that is a good thing. I wish him better days and a brighter future with lots of love.
Another friend of mine has had a life of hardships and family problems. I can't say any one was enough to cause his problems but together they were a weight to great to bear. He still struggles but did get help and he acknowledges the problems he has. I think that is a good beginning.
These are a few examples I can share. Many people have struggles but we have to be most careful. We, the LGBT, have the extra burdens of violence and lack of acceptance and care.
If you have a problem, are sad, or whatever seems to much for you to handle please get help or find someone to unload your troubles upon. A friendly ear can do wonders. It may not be enough but try. Don't let the darkness shroud your world.
The world right now is full of people who fear, don't understand, or refuse to understand. There is violence, hate, and a lack of love in so many. Raise your beacons and proclaim your existence and needs. Help one another.
We lose to many lives. Let us not lose beautiful minds as well. Be well and be free. When a community helps each other we build things of wonder.
I have love for all people. Even those who have hurt me. It is not always easy and many can not understand. All I can say is love. It may not solve everything but it can heal. Hopefully in time with enough love that part of you that struggles is smaller than the love in your life. Then and only then you can look upon things and realize how small they can become in the scope of of life.
Live, Love, Forgive!
Love is Never Wrong!
I'm going to share some things from my life and those I know. The first thing I can say is there is always someone in or near you, dealing with issues, that may need help greater than they can deal with on their own. It is alright to get help. Talking about such things is also ok. There is no shame in someone needing help. There is only shame in those who refuse help or ridicule those in trouble.
Throughout my blog I have talked about my sexual abuse by a family member beginning when I was ten. This person assumed we were in a relationship. We were not. I had no concept of sex at that time. I truly was an oblivious child lost in worlds of wonder my mind provided.
Even to this day that family member walks free and never truly accepts the impact that he had on my life. His mind sees it as a consensual relationship. My mind views it as a horrible awakening into a world of nightmares. There are things I may never forget or truly let go of but I take each day one step at a time.
I talk to whoever I think can handle such, who feels safe. Sometimes I think some of them need to be awarded medals for hearing my stories. They are not easy or kind things to the hear. They can elicit such rage. But I try to remain calm. For me my faith was my comfort.
The sad thing is we have a few in my family with issues. One is the mother of my abuser. When my cousins husband found out about the abuse he was a good man. He wanted to get me help and call the police. I wish he had. Maybe things could have been resolved better.
But that didn't happen. The mother of my abuser intervened. She is a very xenophobic person and rules with an iron fist. I still recall her words to him as if some stoic iron willed titan glared into his soul. "You married into this family . You are not a part of it. This will be dealt with by us." Sadly it was not.
So my family member was now supported by someone who's xenophobia is so extreme she believes in arranged unions and selective partnerships. In other words if you do not pass her muster you are not worthy of the family. Like I said I have a few in my family.
If she were to read this now she would lecture me and badger me into removing these accounts. To her only her world matters. Even when she does help others it becomes a story to promote herself. I believe there are good intentions there but therein lies a problem.
She in her own minds traumas desperately tries to mold the world around her. If everything is not in place or proper order or if things are not controlled she begins to falter. It is never good to let issues go for to long and not face them. She is proof of such. Her world is a glass menagerie. You can look and admire but do not touch. If one of the animals falls and shatters, so does she.
I have a friend who is a good man. but being burdened with a failing marriage and working in health care one night a baby died while he was trying to save it. He has never been the same after that. Sometimes we just snap when our minds can handle no more.
Thankfully he got help. Therapy and medicines now give him a much more normal life. He is not healed but I think he is slowly getting better. It forced him to understand his limits and explore more about who he truly is. And that is a good thing. I wish him better days and a brighter future with lots of love.
Another friend of mine has had a life of hardships and family problems. I can't say any one was enough to cause his problems but together they were a weight to great to bear. He still struggles but did get help and he acknowledges the problems he has. I think that is a good beginning.
These are a few examples I can share. Many people have struggles but we have to be most careful. We, the LGBT, have the extra burdens of violence and lack of acceptance and care.
If you have a problem, are sad, or whatever seems to much for you to handle please get help or find someone to unload your troubles upon. A friendly ear can do wonders. It may not be enough but try. Don't let the darkness shroud your world.
The world right now is full of people who fear, don't understand, or refuse to understand. There is violence, hate, and a lack of love in so many. Raise your beacons and proclaim your existence and needs. Help one another.
We lose to many lives. Let us not lose beautiful minds as well. Be well and be free. When a community helps each other we build things of wonder.
I have love for all people. Even those who have hurt me. It is not always easy and many can not understand. All I can say is love. It may not solve everything but it can heal. Hopefully in time with enough love that part of you that struggles is smaller than the love in your life. Then and only then you can look upon things and realize how small they can become in the scope of of life.
Live, Love, Forgive!
Love is Never Wrong!
Saturday, November 3, 2018
If I were Queen for a day...
Amazing how old songs can make you think. There is wisdom in music, if you listen. So the song that inspired today's post.
"Cause in your dreams
The Demon screams
I know he's going to
Hurt you blind."
I would abolish all the Demons & Devils who haunt our lives. Life is painful enough without outside forces interfering.
"Cause in your dreams
The Demon screams
I know he's going to
Hurt you blind."
I would abolish all the Demons & Devils who haunt our lives. Life is painful enough without outside forces interfering.
"I've heard it said
Or maybe read
Only money makes
The world go round
Or maybe read
Only money makes
The world go round
But all the gold
Won't heal your soul
If your world should
Tumble to the ground"
Won't heal your soul
If your world should
Tumble to the ground"
Money does not make the world go round. It is people who are the most precious things and their dreams propel us into realms unknown. I would decree if one of us falters none of us progress until the fallen can stand and join us.
Funny we know what our hearts crave and we sing about it but we never make it happen. Life is about Love! Love for you and for the others around you. If you can't love then you must go. There is no place in a society that seeks to thrive.
That is the point I think. We all must thrive. Everyone! So if you seek to lead and you leave anyone behind, torture, hurt, or violate the sanctity of the individual you forfeit your power, That is my decree.
Live, Love, Forgive!
So this lonely Queen on her day declares you all free as long as Love, Compassion, Duty, Honor, and Equality are in your minds, hearts, and very soul. And if they are not expressed in your actions then you must be imprisoned as you imprison love. Let love reign for nothing else sustains.
Long Live the Queen? ;)
Love is Never Wrong!
Wednesday, October 31, 2018
Inhumanity
I look around and see young men marching int he streets. Some carry torches, all with rage. The systematic stripping of Human rights is discussed and done while the masses are distracted easily with flashy displays and rhetoric.
The usual minorities LGBT, Jews, Blacks, immigrants, and whoever else does not fit a racial view are harassed, tortured, and murdered. Fear & helplessness affect many, Some with no way to fight back.
Some religious leaders follow in rank and file along with men of business. The old guard views it as us vs. them. Then comes their time and their names are tarnished with the abuse of others so no one who is left helps them.
What a horrible picture it must have been living in Germany in the 1930's as the Nazi regime came to power. What a horrible picture to see it beginning in your own country more than 70 years later. What would the men and women who fought and died so long ago think upon seeing it now.
My observations are not lies, false, or inaccurate. Watch the news. Believe for yourself.
Any movement left or right, elitist or 99%, pious or common... must honor the individual. This is how we got here. People think it is alright to dismiss the wills of others to achieve their goals, for "the common good," I say the common good is what matters to us all, the commoners.
I have posted this link before. Maybe we need to view its stark similarities again. Maybe we won't have to relearn all the darkness we drove back into the deep dark night.
https://www.ushmm.org/
Usually I add some words here but I would rather another did that today.
http://remember.org/malka.html
Love is Never Wrong!
The usual minorities LGBT, Jews, Blacks, immigrants, and whoever else does not fit a racial view are harassed, tortured, and murdered. Fear & helplessness affect many, Some with no way to fight back.
Some religious leaders follow in rank and file along with men of business. The old guard views it as us vs. them. Then comes their time and their names are tarnished with the abuse of others so no one who is left helps them.
What a horrible picture it must have been living in Germany in the 1930's as the Nazi regime came to power. What a horrible picture to see it beginning in your own country more than 70 years later. What would the men and women who fought and died so long ago think upon seeing it now.
My observations are not lies, false, or inaccurate. Watch the news. Believe for yourself.
Any movement left or right, elitist or 99%, pious or common... must honor the individual. This is how we got here. People think it is alright to dismiss the wills of others to achieve their goals, for "the common good," I say the common good is what matters to us all, the commoners.
I have posted this link before. Maybe we need to view its stark similarities again. Maybe we won't have to relearn all the darkness we drove back into the deep dark night.
https://www.ushmm.org/
Usually I add some words here but I would rather another did that today.
http://remember.org/malka.html
Love is Never Wrong!
Sunday, October 21, 2018
Gender
So I wake up this morning to peruse the usual news sources LGBT and otherwise. I find this.
Trump Plans to Legally Abolish Transgender People, Define Gender by Genitalia at Birth: Memo
Gender based on immutable biological traits identifiable by or before birth. So what do we do with hemorphidite children. What about the fact transgender people tend to have the brain chemistry of the gender they associate with. Its there, its a valid trait. DNA does influence outcome, proto tags influence it. Mothers chemistry and temperature influence it....
The truth is you can attach a label to something but it does not change what it is. If you wish to run and hide from the realities of what life is and what people are then you are the one misdiagnosed.
Gender its self is a label that limits. Be who you are and explore who you are. If you are happy with a very narrow definition then great but not everyone is. It is not a world of just one or a few. It is all of our world.
No one has the right to hurt or shame. No one has the right to force one to be what they are not. This debate has nothing to do with gender. This is everything to do with control. I control me. You control you. You can hurt me, abuse me, confuse me... in the end it is and always has been about me.
I am me. If you can not or will not accept that then you need to leave my world now and forever. If you can not live in harmony with all the wonderful peoples who choose to live here then it is you who are the one who must go.
There has been enough darkness, pain, and bloodshed over these horrible forced limitations. Be free and be you. Love the world and those who seek to enslave it one small step at a time. Shine your light upon their wrongs and defy the pain.
If you loved you would love us all. If you can't love us all then that says something loud and clear.
You are you, whoever you may be. Love that. Love the others who are different. Love that we are all different. What a beautiful palette we all make when love touches the sky. To borrow a line...."Touch the rainbow!"
Love is Never Wrong!
Trump Plans to Legally Abolish Transgender People, Define Gender by Genitalia at Birth: Memo
Gender based on immutable biological traits identifiable by or before birth. So what do we do with hemorphidite children. What about the fact transgender people tend to have the brain chemistry of the gender they associate with. Its there, its a valid trait. DNA does influence outcome, proto tags influence it. Mothers chemistry and temperature influence it....
The truth is you can attach a label to something but it does not change what it is. If you wish to run and hide from the realities of what life is and what people are then you are the one misdiagnosed.
Gender its self is a label that limits. Be who you are and explore who you are. If you are happy with a very narrow definition then great but not everyone is. It is not a world of just one or a few. It is all of our world.
No one has the right to hurt or shame. No one has the right to force one to be what they are not. This debate has nothing to do with gender. This is everything to do with control. I control me. You control you. You can hurt me, abuse me, confuse me... in the end it is and always has been about me.
I am me. If you can not or will not accept that then you need to leave my world now and forever. If you can not live in harmony with all the wonderful peoples who choose to live here then it is you who are the one who must go.
There has been enough darkness, pain, and bloodshed over these horrible forced limitations. Be free and be you. Love the world and those who seek to enslave it one small step at a time. Shine your light upon their wrongs and defy the pain.
If you loved you would love us all. If you can't love us all then that says something loud and clear.
You are you, whoever you may be. Love that. Love the others who are different. Love that we are all different. What a beautiful palette we all make when love touches the sky. To borrow a line...."Touch the rainbow!"
Love is Never Wrong!
Thursday, October 18, 2018
Liberty
“Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”
Honored words from so long ago. As one of many I think they should still hold true. However one must honor the country you flee to by at least trying to enter through proper channels.
In recent days to many have come to fear the outsider. As another great American once said "The only thing to fear is fear its self." If we turn our backs on those most in need then we do disservice to the very principles this nation was founded.
What is true however, we can not take everyone. Becoming a refugee should be a last resort. I wish everyone happiness, love, prosperity, and liberty.
A word of advice is that liberty begins in you. Change you, change your family, your home, your town, your nation. The blessings of liberty are hard won. Be free, love, change all that seeks to enslave you.
To the tired, the poor, the huddle masses come if you have no other choice. I can't speak for all but I can say no one who wants and fights for liberty should ever be turned away.
Liberty is love, granted and given. Love the world.
Love is Never Wrong!
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”
Honored words from so long ago. As one of many I think they should still hold true. However one must honor the country you flee to by at least trying to enter through proper channels.
In recent days to many have come to fear the outsider. As another great American once said "The only thing to fear is fear its self." If we turn our backs on those most in need then we do disservice to the very principles this nation was founded.
What is true however, we can not take everyone. Becoming a refugee should be a last resort. I wish everyone happiness, love, prosperity, and liberty.
A word of advice is that liberty begins in you. Change you, change your family, your home, your town, your nation. The blessings of liberty are hard won. Be free, love, change all that seeks to enslave you.
To the tired, the poor, the huddle masses come if you have no other choice. I can't speak for all but I can say no one who wants and fights for liberty should ever be turned away.
Liberty is love, granted and given. Love the world.
Love is Never Wrong!
Sunday, October 14, 2018
Being Lonely
So many of us in our community are lonely. There are many reasons for this. Most of it can be boiled down to two many issues. We are never truly accepted in society and face isolation and harassment on a regular basis. The other issue being what it means to be us. Every LGBT person will have a different answer.
This has been a problem for so long. The answer however is a lot simpler. The hard part is undoing all those forced gender norms and expectations. If we were honest it would sound like this. "I am sorry straight society you are dysfunctional even amongst your own."
What does it mean to be a man?, a woman?, to belong, to be a family? Ask anyone and you will get different answers. They may have similarities but no absolutes. There lies the problem. You expect us to conform to something that never conforms to you.
Men can dress up in women's clothing and full make wanting to feel pretty and still be straight. Gay men can be masculine, outgoing and jocks. Lesbians can be beautiful and dainty. Transgender can be straight but the wrong gender.
For far to long the few who want their view of what is normal have forced, bullied, humiliated, and murdered us to fit a mould. It is not about religion, morality, or society. It has always been about power. If they can make you do what they want they keep you off balance.
The truth is we are all beautiful, we are all worthy of love. Their is no definition to love. It is instead a wondrous thing that enchants when we let if free. Try it sometime. Hold your tongue. Don't lecture, support. Judge love not likeness. Accept even if its not you or you understand.
People are... Families are... Love is... It is that simple. The definition is in what works for you and how you shape your life. You can't be anything or anyone other than you. As I have said society is not ready for us. It really has not been ready for its self. So just love.
Now all this being said I am not advocating for anarchy or wholesale rejection of traditions. I am saying however take that which fits you and preserve that. But before you reject what you think is not you at least try to understand what you are rejecting. If you do not then you are on the same path as what has hurt you.
My only other advice is when you love, truly love. Don't settle. Love and you are priceless. You don't have to do anything that does not feel right or enrich you. If someone is trying to say otherwise get away from them. You can only be you and you are capable of love and value.
Even in love there may be roads of pain but know are the light in the dark. The darkness is being consumed into the definitions that are not you.
To those who live in the dark I say you are wrong and always have been. It doesn't matter if you can be at the top, have power, or fame. It doesn't matter what you think on anything other than you. If you truly cared you would celebrate all those wonderful differences we have in life and cherish those who make your life better.
Two life long friends can raise a child together and be a family. Two women who madly love one another can be a family. A family friend who takes in an orphan can be a family. All you need is love.
What's normal? The answer is you. What's not normal? The answer is anything that hurts another or yourself. To many take it upon themselves to dictate life. Never do that.
You can advise, support, love, even toss your hands up in frustration. But always love, always accept, even if its not you. Acceptance is not approval. It is love. I may not understand or agree but I love you and I want you to be happy, even if its not my life.
Life can be lonely but if we love we can be fulfilled. Go bask in that warmth I think you will find loneliness fades and people flock to you. You can't fake it. You can't imitate it. You can only experience it.
If you can't, find help. Find someone. Life is a journey of emotions and experiences. Don't miss the biggest part of your journey.
Live, Love, Forgive.
Love is Never Wrong!
This has been a problem for so long. The answer however is a lot simpler. The hard part is undoing all those forced gender norms and expectations. If we were honest it would sound like this. "I am sorry straight society you are dysfunctional even amongst your own."
What does it mean to be a man?, a woman?, to belong, to be a family? Ask anyone and you will get different answers. They may have similarities but no absolutes. There lies the problem. You expect us to conform to something that never conforms to you.
Men can dress up in women's clothing and full make wanting to feel pretty and still be straight. Gay men can be masculine, outgoing and jocks. Lesbians can be beautiful and dainty. Transgender can be straight but the wrong gender.
For far to long the few who want their view of what is normal have forced, bullied, humiliated, and murdered us to fit a mould. It is not about religion, morality, or society. It has always been about power. If they can make you do what they want they keep you off balance.
The truth is we are all beautiful, we are all worthy of love. Their is no definition to love. It is instead a wondrous thing that enchants when we let if free. Try it sometime. Hold your tongue. Don't lecture, support. Judge love not likeness. Accept even if its not you or you understand.
People are... Families are... Love is... It is that simple. The definition is in what works for you and how you shape your life. You can't be anything or anyone other than you. As I have said society is not ready for us. It really has not been ready for its self. So just love.
Now all this being said I am not advocating for anarchy or wholesale rejection of traditions. I am saying however take that which fits you and preserve that. But before you reject what you think is not you at least try to understand what you are rejecting. If you do not then you are on the same path as what has hurt you.
My only other advice is when you love, truly love. Don't settle. Love and you are priceless. You don't have to do anything that does not feel right or enrich you. If someone is trying to say otherwise get away from them. You can only be you and you are capable of love and value.
Even in love there may be roads of pain but know are the light in the dark. The darkness is being consumed into the definitions that are not you.
To those who live in the dark I say you are wrong and always have been. It doesn't matter if you can be at the top, have power, or fame. It doesn't matter what you think on anything other than you. If you truly cared you would celebrate all those wonderful differences we have in life and cherish those who make your life better.
Two life long friends can raise a child together and be a family. Two women who madly love one another can be a family. A family friend who takes in an orphan can be a family. All you need is love.
What's normal? The answer is you. What's not normal? The answer is anything that hurts another or yourself. To many take it upon themselves to dictate life. Never do that.
You can advise, support, love, even toss your hands up in frustration. But always love, always accept, even if its not you. Acceptance is not approval. It is love. I may not understand or agree but I love you and I want you to be happy, even if its not my life.
Life can be lonely but if we love we can be fulfilled. Go bask in that warmth I think you will find loneliness fades and people flock to you. You can't fake it. You can't imitate it. You can only experience it.
If you can't, find help. Find someone. Life is a journey of emotions and experiences. Don't miss the biggest part of your journey.
Live, Love, Forgive.
Love is Never Wrong!
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